That’s right. The British government is advising parents that they should only discuss their sexual values with their children, but not try to convince them of what’s right and wrong because it “may discourage them from being open.” I’m irked by the fact that the government thinks it can tell parents how they should teach their kids values. I’m amazed that England thinks this will help their society. What good comes out of teens doing whatever they want sexually? Nothing.
February 23, 2009
British Parents Advised Not to Try to Convince their Kids of their own Sexual Values
Posted by Jason Dulle under Political Incorrectness, Relativism, Social[13] Comments
Thinking to Believe 
February 25, 2009 at 6:36 pm
sexuality is such a primitive urge though, and to try to tell children that the way they feel inside might be “wrong”, can be devastating.
if you tried to equate defecation (for example) with shame (like some parents might do with sexual urges) you’d end up with a child feeling natural feelings and getting a twisted mindset towards the whole thing.
children need to be educated about the reality – not taught what we think is “right and wrong”, why are we right?
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February 26, 2009 at 2:59 pm
Of course it is natural. No one is saying sexual urges are bad. They are a gift of God. But there is context in which we are to fulfill those urges: marriage. Look at all the social ills we have due to rampant and casual sex: STDs, single parenthood, abortion, etc. Clearly this practice is not good for society.
Jason
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February 26, 2009 at 3:36 pm
There are issues yes, but abstinence until marriage isn’t the answer, education is.
I’ve seen so many christians marry young just to have sex and so many average marriages due to it. Sex is natural and OK and people get STDs because they want to have sex but have no safe route to do it, possibly because their parents/community disapprove
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February 28, 2009 at 4:09 pm
Ophalm,
I fail to see how education is going to help matters. People are highly educated when it comes to knowing about protection, and yet they ignore what they know.
As for marrying young just to have sex, I’m sure some do. I haven’t been seeing too much of that in the churches I am a part of, however. I, for example, did not marry until I was 28. My wife was 29.
To suggest that people get STDs because they have no safe rout for sex because their parents/community disapprove of sex is a little far-fetched. Even kids who are raised in Christian and conservative homes know about condoms and birth control.
The fact of the matter is that there is no safe sex outside of marriage. All of it is risky. And this isn’t even taking into account the emotional toll it has on people, particularly women. Women who have multiple sex partners in life often express regret, and often feel empty as a result. We were not designed for casual sex. Sex is about the giving of oneself to another. That’s meant for a lifetime, not for a night, or for a few months.
Jason
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February 28, 2009 at 8:42 pm
I think there are too many presumptions. The absolutely safest way isn’t the most practical way or the best way to expect. The safest way to drive is to drive at less than <30km/h, but that’s not practical.
You’re claiming that we need to teach abstinence essentially, but have you seen how much of a failure that has been in the US?
I have only had sex with my wife too, I saved myself for her. But now that I’m married, we both agree sex isn’t a big of a deal as we thought it was, and we’re not going to bring our children up the same way we were (to only view sex within marriage as ok)
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March 1, 2009 at 3:14 am
I just don’t buy the idea that people cannot exercise self-restraint. They can. But if society does not expect it of our children, then the majority won’t. If we do expect it, the majority will. But society has lost its will.
The failure is not with the abstinence-until-marriage message. It is the only message that will effectively stop STDs and teen pregnancy/abortion. The problem is with society. The “hump whoever you want” message is proclaimed far more often. Everything from the music kids listen to, to the stuff they watch on TV/movies, promotes sex. They are basically being told that everyone sleeps together on the first date or two. They are being bombarded with images of scantily clad women. Our girls teen magazines talk about sex. With all of the social pressure and normalization, it’s no wonder the one abstinence message they might have heard gets drowned out.
“The Irish Study of Sexual Health and Relationships, the largest nationally representative study on sexual knowledge, attitudes and behaviour ever undertaken in Ireland, was published by the Department of Health and the Crisis Pregnancy Agency (CPA) today.
“The research found that 14.9 per cent of men and 7.9 per cent of women first engaged in sex when they were less than 16 years old. A majority of the women in that group (59 percent) and more than a third of the men (37 percent) regretted it.”
Or read stories of those like this UK woman: http://www.guardian.co.uk/lifeandstyle/2008/feb/23/familyandrelationships2.
Jason
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March 1, 2009 at 8:24 pm
I understand your point of view and in some ideal world I agree it’s a great idea.
But I think it’s an unrealistic message (even if the current message doesn’t help either) and I think there are far deeper issues, and we can probably agree that “the problem is with society”.. I just don’t agree that ‘waiting until marriage’ is the solution
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March 1, 2009 at 9:26 pm
Well, if waiting until marriage would solve the woes plaguing our society like STDs, teen pregnancy, and single parenthood (which I think is beyond dispute), then how is waiting until marriage not the solution? Of course it is. It’s just that you think the solution is too radical–idealistic without being realistic. But I think more highly of our ability to exercise self-control. But if society does not demand that we do, we won’t.
Jason
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March 2, 2009 at 2:06 am
Well you understand my position, so you must also understand that I still disagree 🙂
I don’t think society has the self control. I have seen no evidence throughout any history to convince me otherwise. When society does try abstinence, it fails.
“woes plaguing society”. teen pregnancy is lower than almost ever in history (in the western world). we have STDs but 150 years ago a substantially higher amount of people died of infectious diseases and the life expectancy was <50. single parenthood is somewhat of an issue, but asking everyone to wait until marriage assumes far too much. it seems like you want some form of utopia. what about those who don’t want marriage? should they stay celibate?
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March 2, 2009 at 11:31 am
Yes, I understand that. 🙂
Society used to have self-control in this area, particularly when the majority believed it was morally wrong. Yes, I know some people still had sex outside of marriage, but they were the minority.
I know teen pregnancy has been on the decline (in the UK at least, it is going back up again), but it is still too much.
Yes, people died of other things 150 years ago, but what follows from that? The fact remains that casual sex is the cause for many modern illnesses, and the only way to fix them is to stop doing the behavior that causes them.
Yes, those who do not want marriage should remain celebate. Anything else is socially irresponsible. We need to start thinking about what is good for society, and not just what is good for us.
Jason
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March 2, 2009 at 4:22 pm
But I guess that’s where we disagree. I believe there is a balance between community and personal freedom. You clearly believe the tipping point should be closer to community than freedom. I feel it should be close towards freedom.
I don’t for a second think it’s black and white, one or the other. It’s a fine line drawn in the sand. I personally feel too close to community and you’re forcing some people to act against their will. I think sexuality is a moral issue, and therefor should be left up to individuals to decide. Maybe we need better education and I think you’re right about “the wrong message in the media”, but yeah..
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March 6, 2009 at 3:01 pm
When is anyone forcing someone to act against their will? I think the only answer is to return to actual censorship. People get all offended about that but is it REALLY necessary to show sexual acts in every Hollywood movie? I would appreciate having the option to view movies where when a couple are about to mate, it fades to black.
Think about it, Hollywood is turning us into Peeping Toms, something anyone would be humiliated to be accused of. But the best movies are the ones where you feel like you’ve gotten to know the characters, and then the camera follows them right into the bedroom. What are we but a nation of peeping toms? Not only that but we’re PAYING to see it, paying peeping toms…
I DON’T NEED to see some guy’s pubes hanging out of his jeans on the magazine racks in the grocery store lines, suggestively looking at me. Or walking by an Abercrombe and Fitch “larger-than-life” poster. I didn’t need Janet Jackson sluttin her stuff during half time two years ago, long before she exposed her anatomy. I didn’t need to see two gay men graphically laying liplocks on each other as I sat next to my wide-eyed young son innocently swinging his legs on the theater seat as we watched “Big Daddy.”
Then a friend of mine told me he used to rent movies that had been converted to G content, but some Hollywood Guild filed a lawsuit.
We are DELUGED with sexually explicit images and all of the teen roll models are hopping in the sack with men that marry them by the end of the movie (psssssp, men rarely marry women that jump in the sack with them the first night, contrary to Hollywood’s messages)and we assume our kids know this but WHY WOULD THEY? After all, when they hit age 13, they realize mom and dad don’t know EVERYTHING and are questioning anything we tell them. Hey, Julia Roberts, Demi Moore, Meg Ryan all got married after jumping in the sack, what does mom know?
Everyone hates the word, but “Censorship” <—-bring it back.
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March 23, 2009 at 12:16 pm
I agree Jason, but it is pointing to what is to come as ENDTIME and other prophecy ministries have been warning us of what is to come for years. And the way that the media miniplates the thinking of the masses, it may be just a matter of time before the majority of people will think that the government is the only one that should dictate what we think. We are losing more and more of our rights it seems daily here in America. We really need to be alert and inivolved in standing against bad policy. Okay, I’ll stop. But really, there is so much going on that is leading to a One World Government/Religion that it is amazing.
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